We're really proud to share an inspiring piece written by one of our recent graduates, Madalena Mota. In response to the question, "If you could give a speech on any topic, what would it be?", she crafted an impressive and thoughtful reflection on the theme of self-acceptance. She looks at E.M. Forster's A Room with a View to demonstrate how being true to yourself can help you deal with the ups and downs of growing up. We are pleased to share her words as a tribute to the courage and wisdom of our Learners.
How reading E.M Forster's A Room with a View has challenged me to practise self acceptance
It was not until I read E.M Forster's A Room with a View that I was able to find beauty in what is often the darkness of growing into maturity. Lucy Honeychurch, the heroine of the novel, is subjected to encounters which force her to accept and become her true self, as the story unfolds. Surpassing struggles within herself, her love life, and her family dynamic, Lucy is able to own her truth. As an eighteen year old woman, I long to achieve this same process - maybe not in the eloquent words of Forster, but in my very own palaver, in my very own way, in my very own timeline. Thus, if I was granted the chance to give an important speech, it would certainly be on how the acceptance of self is the most crucial tool we can possess as human beings, and how it is, truly, the beauty of life.
This may appear to be a very obvious topic, the acceptance of the self. However, as my time in the universe ticks, in incessant circles, I understand that the process of this acceptance is seldom done with care. I find that people conform to societal expectations in a way that is almost subconscious, never questioning their true ambitions. The truth is that, from the moment we are placed in this world, we are bombarded with what others want us to become, we are wired to mirror other's expectations. It is, at times, almost impossible to find silence in this world of perpetual noise, and thus lose oneself in such silence, contemplating who we aim to become.
This was the case of Lucy Honeychurch, who knew no better than to base her choices on other's desires. It was only at the end of the novel that Lucy accepted and honoured her ambitions. And, I dare say, this is what happens to most of us - it is only when we are running out of time that we set aside others expectations and unreluctantly stand by our own aspirations.
The truth is that one may be able to mature willingly, naturally, whenever the forces of earth believe they are ready to. This type of process is one I believe we all long for. However, some of us are subjected to one quite different, perhaps not so natural, not so positive, one which does not stem from the passing of time. Some of us may be forced to grow up too early, to discover self acceptance in an almost abrupt way. And, I must add, it is not only this process that brings pain - living in sync with our desires can also, and, will, certainly, bring pain. Achieving self acceptance is brave, but the most courageous act is to remain loyal to such self acceptance, adopting, everyday, a way of living life which obeys to it.
Upon focusing on the painful process of achieving maturity, you may be asking yourself how I see beauty in it. I believe that through this process we not only become more aware of ourselves, but of our surroundings too. Because with accepting oneself comes the notion that others may be immeasurably trying to do so as well; with accepting oneself comes the notion of utter hope. Once we practise acceptance we are gifted with self awareness, becoming wired to lead a life marked by freedom of self and empathy for others.
In reality, one's life is, simply, or not so simply, a coming-of-age story. Except we aren't all like Lucy. Perhaps, some of us linger in the darkness of naivety for too long. Personally, I enjoy indulging in the idea that I have left, or that I am working towards leaving the darkness of such naivety. I'd be lying if I said maturing did not bring darkness as well, or maybe some deeper questions about life. But I would also be lying if I did not say the world becomes slightly brighter once we mature into our true, free selves.